


More Than Nothing

by Silvaimagery



Category: Vikings (TV)
Genre: AU, Anger, F/M, Finding Oneself, Forgiveness, Guilt, Jealousy, M/M, Multi, Season 2, Training, War, friendships, injuries
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-18
Updated: 2014-04-18
Packaged: 2018-01-19 21:14:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1484233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Silvaimagery/pseuds/Silvaimagery
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rollo was not the friendliest of people, in fact he was downright scary.  But Rollo was the brother of the man he loved.  So he had to make an effort.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just got this idea when I was re-watching Season 2. Rollo did do a complete one-eighty from one episode to the next. I thought it would be nice if our favorite Christian had a hand in it. And I felt bad for Rollo. Takes place during ‘Brother’s War’ and after. 
> 
> No Aslaug. And Thyri and Gyda did not die. Also, I know Ubbe is Ragnar and Aslaug’s child, but in this story he is Ragnar and Lagertha’s son.
> 
> Title comes from a song in the soundtrack to ‘The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel’ by Thomas Newman.

After Ragnar leaves angry about the whole ugly business with Rollo, I go out and go to where Rollo is being kept.

Torstein nods at me.

“Can I speak with him?”

Torstein looks at Rollo then back at me.

“Alright.”

He stands and leaves.

“Thank you.” I tell him.

Rollo is sitting there in the cold, his chest bare and still covered in blood and dirt.

I grab a bucket of water and a rag from nearby and I walk slowly up to him.

I wet the rag and begin to wash his body.

He doesn’t acknowledge me.

I continue to work in silence.

After I finish washing his arms and his back, I move so that I am facing him.

I kneel and carefully begin to wash his face.

He looks at me.

“Why are you doing this?”

“I once asked Thyri the same thing, at Uppsala. Of course, that was different. I didn’t know I was being sacrificed.” I smile.

“You still didn’t answer my question. Why are you being nice to me?”

“Because your brother cares about you and I care about your brother.”

“Is that why?”

“I don’t know if you know this but I am a Christian and I wouldn’t be a very good one if I didn’t help you.”

“And how will you help me?”

“By being your friend.”

“I don’t need a friend, priest.”

“Well you have one anyways.”

He looks away.

I begin to hum a psalm that I still remembered.

“Is it true that you are a Christina now?” I ask as I wash his neck.

He snorts a laugh.

“I suppose that we do have that in common.” He says.

“Good. I feel much better knowing that there is another Christian in Kattegat that I can talk to.”

“There won’t be another one for much longer.”

“Don’t say that. Ragnar won’t let them kill you.”

“My brother has every right to ask for my death.”

“Yes but he won’t.”

He stares at me.

“You seem very sure of this.”

I shrug.

“I know Ragnar, he will find a way to save you. I am not saying that he won’t punish you later. You did kill Erne and hurt Floki.”

“I should die.” He says quietly.

“No. You can work towards fixing the wrongs you have done. If you are dead, what good will that serve?”

“How will I accomplish that? By becoming a priest like you?” He says angrily.

I place my hands over his.

“Rollo. You are a good man, you can be a good man. You just have to want to be good.”

“Leave me be priest.”

“Alright.”

I wipe down his chest.

He glares at me.

“I said leave me be. Just go!”

“Not till I am finished.”

“I should have killed you when I had the chance.”

“That is not very Christian of you Brother Rollo.”

He doesn’t say anything.

I begin to clean his hands.

“It’s Rolf.”

“What?”

“The Christian name given to me by your Englishmen.”

“Rolf.” I repeat. “I think Rollo suits you better.”

He smiles.

Once I am finished washing him, I stand and remove my cloak.

I place it over his shoulders making sure to clasp it.

“Thank you.” He says looking up at me.

I nod.

When I go back home, I quietly make my way to the bedroom.

Lagertha is sleeping but Ragnar is awake.

He stares at me.

I remove my boots and my socks before removing my breeches and my shirt.

I put on my night shirt.

“Where have you been?”

“I went to see Rollo.”

He stands, his face angry.

“Why?”

“Because he is your brother and a fellow Christian.”

He smiles and advances on me.

He grabs me by the back of my neck.

“You cannot save my brother priest.”

“I will never know unless I try.”

“I forbid it.”

“No.”

“What?”

“I know that you love your brother and that you are angry right now. You are hurt that your brother betrayed you. But you have to understand that he did it because he was scared.”

“Scared?”

“You are Earl and you are a great warrior. Rollo just wanted to be a bit more equal to you.”

“And I am supposed to forgive what he has done? I did not ask for greatness, the gods have given it to me.”

“I know that. And Rollo knows that. But knowing it doesn’t mean that he still doesn’t feel like you are leaving him behind.”

He points a finger at me.

“You are not to see my brother.”

“Ragnar.”

“I have given you an order and you will do as I say!”

The baby starts crying.

I walk over and pick him up.

I hold him close to my chest and I rock him slowly.

He calms down.

Ragnar sighs and rubs his eyes.

“Athelstan.” He says quietly.

I turn my back and continue to rock the baby.

Ragnar places his hand on the back of my neck again, gently this time.

He kisses the side of my head.

“Forgive me.” He says quietly.

“You should rest, I will watch Ubbe.”

He kisses my cheek before taking my arm and leading to the bed.

He sits and pushes me down between his legs so that my back is against his chest.

“I did not mean to yell at you.”

“I understand.”

Ubbe stretches in my arms.

Ragnar caresses the baby’s face with a finger.

“I have missed you.” He tells me.

“I missed you too.”

“Lagertha tells me that you helped her during the birth of my son.”

“He came suddenly in the middle of the night.”

“Hmm. I am glad you were here with her.”

I nod.

He takes one of my hands and kisses it before placing an arm ring on my wrist.

I look at it before looking at him.

He smiles.

“You deserve it for all that you have done. For protecting my family.”

“I don’t know what to say.”

“Say you accept it.”

“Yes, I do accept it.”

“Good.”

He kisses the corner of my mouth.

***********************

“Are you not coming to the judgment?”

I look at Bjorn.

“No. I think I will stay here.”

He shrugs and walks away.

Ubbe starts to fuss and I pick him up.

I start to whisper to him passages I can remember in Latin.

The gospel of St. John I had brought with me from Lindisfarne had long ago become nothing more than dust.

I kiss his forehead as he settles down.

Lagertha comes over to us.

She rests her chin on my shoulder.

“What is the matter?” She asks me.

“Nothing.”

“Hmm. You fear that Ragnar will let Rollo die for what he has done.”

I sigh.

“I know that Ragnar will not let his brother die but I am scared that I might be wrong.”

“It is already out of our hands.” I hand Ubbe to her. “The gods have already decided.”

“And what do you think?”

“I think that it is not up to us to question their will.”

“That does not help me at all.”

She laughs and kisses me before sitting to feed Ubbe.


	2. Chapter 2

“Priest.”

“Thyri.”

“I came to speak with you.”

“Alright. Sit.”

She sits down next to me.

“It’s about Rollo.”

“Is he alright?”

“He is leaving.”

“What? Why?”

“He doesn’t feel like he deserves to stay.”

“Oh.”

“Can you speak with him? Mother is upset about it and he won’t listen to either one of us.”

“I can try but I don’t know how much help I can be.”

“Thank you.” She says kissing my cheek.

I walk with Thyri back to Rollo’s house.

“Look who has come to visit.” Thyri says opening the door and gesturing me to enter on ahead.

Siggy comes towards me, a hopeful look on her face.

She takes my hands in hers and smiles before moving away.

Rollo looks at me and sighs angrily.

“Save your words priest. You won’t change my mind.”

“We will let you have a moment.” Siggy says taking Thyri with her and walking out of the house.

“Rollo.”

“Why can’t anyone understand that I can’t stay?” He says pounding his fist against the table.

“Because we care for you. Siggy is your wife and Thyri is your daughter. They do not want you to leave them behind.”

“And you? Why have you come?”

“Because you are my friend.”

“I told you already that I don’t need you to be my friend.”

“Well I am. And I think you should go and speak with Ragnar.”

“What for?”

“He is your brother. You should try to make amends.”

“He will not see me.”

“How do you know if you haven’t tried?”

He comes towards me and putting a hand around my neck, he pushes me up against the wall.

I place a hand over his wrist but I do not struggle.

“What do you know?”

“He cares about you.”

“So you have said.”

“Can you not see how your actions have hurt him? You are his eldest brother, he looks up to you no matter how much he might show otherwise. You are the one that thought him to hold a sword, the one who showed him to be a warrior. He needs you just as much as you need him.”

He lets me go and steps back.

I rub my neck.

“Come and speak with him. If he will not see you then at least come and meet your new nephew.”

“Alright.”

********************

“Uncle Rollo!” Gyda throws her arms around Rollo.

Ragnar stands from his chair.

Rollo smiles down at Gyda before moving towards his brother.

“What do you want?” Ragnar asks.

“To speak with you.”

“Then speak.”

For once the hall was empty except for the family.

At least there would be no witnesses.

Lagertha looks at me and nods, a smile small on her face.

Gyda stands next to me and I wrap an arm around her shoulders.

Siggy stands next to me.

“I am still your brother.”

“You chose to fight against me.”

“I remember when we were boys, we often fought against each other. Isn’t that always the way with brothers?” Ragnar looks away. “They hate and love each other all the time.”

“You could have killed me.” Ragnar says quietly. “Like you killed One-Eye.”

“I could never have killed you.”

“Tell me, why should I ever trust you again?”

“Because I ask you to.”

“Shouldn’t you be asking for forgiveness after everything you have done?”

Rollo lowers his head.

“I ask only for the opportunity to regain your respect, to fight beside you again in battle.”

Ragnar looks at me before looking back at his brother.

“Let me think on it. Then I’ll give you my decision.”

Rollo nods.

He turns to walk away but Lagertha calls out to him.

She walks down the steps and holds out Ubbe.

“This is your nephew Ubbe.”

Rollo bends to kiss the baby’s forehead.

“He is a strong boy and he will grow to be a strong warrior like his father.” He tells her.

She smiles and nods.

He walks out, Siggy following after him.

********************

“I want you to come sailing west with me.”

I look down at my hands.

“What is the matter?” He asks.

“It’s just. The children and Lagertha.”

“Bjorn is old enough to look out for the family and don’t forget that Lagertha is stronger than us both.”

“And Rollo?”

He sits up.

“What about Rollo?”

“Is he coming with us?”

“Why would he?”

“Because you have forgiven him.”

“He can’t be trusted.”

“But you said you would think on it.”

“And so I have.”

“So you are not going to let him come?”

“That is what I said.”

“Then I will stay here.”

“Why are you being so stubborn about this?” He frowns.

“He is my friend.”

“Do you think my brother cares whether you stay or go?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

He stands and paces away angrily.

“Besides, you have always counted on me to look after the children while you were away and Lagertha still needs her rest.”

“I would have thought you would have wanted to come with me.”

“I am of more use here. You can’t replace Rollo with me on your raids.”

“I am not trying to replace him with you!”

“We both know I will never be as good as Rollo with an axe or a sword.”

I smile trying to lighten the mood.

He comes towards me and cups my face in his hands.

“Athelstan. Forget about Rollo. I am asking you to come on this journey with me, I want you on this journey with me.”

I look into his eyes and find only sincerity.

I cover his hands with mine.

“I’m sorry Ragnar but I can’t.”

“So that is it then?”

“Yes.”

He grabs his cup of ale and throws it across the room.

I look away.

“Stay then. See if Rollo even cares.”

He storms out of the room.

*****************

I watch Ragnar sail away.

He stares back at me before turning his back.

Floki waves at me.

I close my eyes.

A hand lands on my shoulder.

Rollo meets my gaze.

“Do not be upset priest. There is always next time. Come, let us go back.”

I look at the ships one last time before letting Rollo lead me away.


	3. Chapter 3

While Ragnar was gone, Lagertha once more took over the task of presiding over the people and the assemblies.

Bjorn and Gyda would take their places beside her and I would stand at her shoulder.

Every day there was something different and not always that interesting.

“I can see why my brother would much rather be raiding than sitting here and listening to all this nonsense all the time.”

I smile.

“Tell me, has Ragnar showed you how to defend yourself?”

I look at Rollo.

“Not really.”

“Then I will show you.”

I watch him eat.

“But I can’t, I could never kill anyone.”

“How do you plan to protect your family? By throwing your holy book at their heads?”

I smile.

“No.”

“Well then, perhaps your god gives you magical protection?”

“No.”

“I didn’t think so. He didn’t stop you from being taken from your home.”

I look down at my plate.

“No. He didn’t.”

“For which I am glad.” 

I look at him.

He places a hand on my shoulder and smiles at me.

“Come, eat. You will need your strength.” He says nodding down at my plate.

I nod and pick up a piece of meat.

I look at him.

“Promise you will go easy on me.”

He snorts and shakes his head.

“Ragnar has truly been too easy on you.”

********************

“Widen your stand, bend your knees just a bit. Good. Now hold the head of your axe against the back of your shield to help you hold it. You don’t want your arm to get tired before you even start fighting.”

“Like this?”

He corrects the position of my arms before nodding.

He moves so that we are facing each other.

“Do not look at my face instead look at my arms, my hands. They will tell you what I will do.”

I nod.

He shows me how to fend off blows and how to give a few of my own.

“Faster now.”

“Alright. Just promise you won’t really hurt me.”

He snorts.

********************

We continue to practice sparring whenever I have a free moment.

Lagertha would sometimes sit with Ubbe out in the front steps and watch.

The children would always be standing by to shout encouragement.

I hold up my shield.

He comes at me and I fend off every single one of his blows.

I smile at him.

“Not bad for a shield-maiden.” He smirks.

I shake my head with a laugh.

I throw my shield aside.

“You were the one that taught me how to use a shield.”

“Yes. But I think you are light enough on your feet, the shield will only weigh you down.”

“Like this then.”

He comes at me again and I am able to fend him off for the most part.

He jumps away as I swing at him with my axe.

“Don’t be stupid Athelstan. Now you are just fighting scared.” He reprimands.

I pant, the sweat stinging my eyes.

“Maybe we should rest for a moment.”

“In battle there is no rest until the enemy has been defeated.”

“Yes but we are not in battle.”

He swings at me with his sword.

I fend off the blow with my axe.

“How do you plan to get better if you stop just as your aim is improving?”

“I don’t really think I’m getting all that good.”

He smirks and swings at me again.

I hold down his sword with my axe.

He leans towards me.

“If all those priests could see you now Brother Athelstan.”

He breaks free of my hold and comes at me again.

We practice until I feel like my arms are going to fall off.

I rest my hands on my knees, my breath wheezing out of my throat.

I groan.

He pats my back.

“You did very well today.”

“Thank you.”

“Just remember, never hesitate. Because they won’t.”

I nod.

I drag myself to the house where the servants prepare a bath for me.

I groan as I submerge myself in hot water.

I relax until the water becomes tepid.

I get out and put on my night shirt.

I fall into bed with a groan.

Lagertha comes in a moment later with a sleeping Ubbe in her arms.

She smiles down at me.

“You were very impressive priest.”

I sigh.

“Rollo thought so too.”

“You have improved greatly.”

“Thank you.”

She sets Ubbe down in his cradle before climbing into bed with me.

She puts her hand on my chest and smiles down at me.

“I want you.”

I sit up.

I twine a strand of her hair around my finger.

“We shouldn’t.”

“Why not?”

“You just gave birth.”

“That was months ago.”

“Still. It was a very difficult birth. I would not want to hurt you.”

“You won’t.”

“Are you sure?”

She pushes me back down before straddling me.

“Trust me.” She says before leaning down to kiss me.

I put my hands on her hips and return her kiss.

“The children?” I ask between kisses.

“Busy somewhere else.”

I roll her over so that she is on her back.

She laughs.

“Now I want you even more. I like this side of you priest.”

“Good because I am about to do very un-priestly things to you.”

“Let us hope your god is looking the other way.”

I bend to kiss her neck before my lips trail down her chest.

Now I was really happy that I had stayed behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Could not decide whether or not they used the word ‘crib’ back then so I just went with cradle.


	4. Chapter 4

We are sitting down to have our midday meal when Siggy comes running in.

“What is it?” Lagertha asks.

“Rollo sent me. Jarl Borg is attacking.”

I stand.

Gyda winds her arms around my waist.

I pull her close.

“Bjorn. Take your sister and Ubbe and start making your way to the mountains, quickly.” Lagertha instructs.

“I can fight.” Bjorn says.

“Not today.”

“But Mother-”

“Do as I say!”

“Come with us.” Gyda tells me.

“Priest.” Lagertha says coming towards me.

“I will stay and fight.” I tell her.

She nods.

“Siggy. Take the children.”

Thyri comes in and starts to lead Gyda and Bjorn out of the house.

Siggy takes Ubbe.

Lagertha grabs her shield and her sword.

I grab my axe.

All those who are able to fight are assembled.

“I suppose now we will see if I have trained you sufficiently.” Rollo tells me.

I smile at him.

“Let us hope that you have.”

Fires are lit and archers are assembled.

They spear pieces of sponge and cloth soaked with oil onto their arrows and once the boats are close enough, they light the arrows and let them fly.

All five ships are set on fire and Jarl Borg’s men are forced to jump into the water.

They are still far from the docks so they have to swim with their shields and weapons strapped to their backs.

“Stay close to me.” Rollo tells me.

I swallow, my heart hammering in my chest.

I close my eyes and try to calm my breathing.

“Remember what I taught you.”

I nod.

Some of the men drown and those who risked staying on the burning ships die.

I swallow down bile as I hear their agonized screams.

Jarl Borg steps onto the shore, too many men still with him.

“Please god, help us.” I pray before kissing the cross I still carried around my neck.

Rollo crosses himself before we charge.

I manage to dodge a lot of axes aimed at my head and I secured a shield just in time to block a sword from splitting me in two.

“Fall back!” Lagertha yells.

Rollo falls as a spear almost tears into his chest.

“Rollo!”

I run up behind Jarl Borg’s warrior and embed my axe deep into his back.

He falls.

Rollo stares up at me in surprise.

I hold out a hand and help him up.

“Back to the marketplace!” Lagertha instructs.

Rollo bends to pick up his sword.

Jarl Borg lifts his own sword, planning to spear Rollo with it.

I throw my axe at him and surprisingly, it finds its mark.

I gasp.

Jarl Borg looks down at his chest where my axe is embedded before looking at me.

I was not sure which of us was more surprised.

Jarl Borg falls.

Everything seems to stop.

Lagertha stares at me.

I open my mouth.

Rollo starts to laugh.

I stare at him.

He slaps me on the back.

I blink, still not comprehending what has happened.

The fight is over.

We have won.

I close my eyes in relief.

“Come priest, tonight we shall celebrate and salute you.” Rollo tells me.

Lagertha runs up to me and grabbing my face, she kisses me.

*****************

Jarl Borg’s warriors are assembled.

Most of them plead allegiance to Earl Ragnar and to Lady Lagertha.

Those who won’t are executed.

A feast is thrown in celebration of our victory.

A messenger is sent out to call back our people who fled.

Siggy, Thyri and the children return later that afternoon.

Lagertha takes Ubbe in her arms.

Gyda runs at me and I hug her.

“I am so glad you are alive.” She smiles up at me.

“Me too.”

“To the priest!” Rollo says.

“To the priest!” The crowd cheers.

Lagertha smiles at me and I raise my cup to salute her.

“Is it true you killed Jarl Borg?” Bjorn asks me.

“Yes, it’s true.”

He shakes his head.

“I suppose stranger things have happened.” He frowns.

I laugh.

I reach out and bring him into hug.

He fights me a moment but he sits at my side for the rest of the evening.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sexy stuff ahead.

Ragnar presses his lips against mine hungrily.

“I have heard of your bravery my beautiful priest.”

I gasp as his hands rub against my growing hardness.

“I was just doing my duty.”

“Is that all? Perhaps I should have asked you to do your duty long ago.”

I frown.

“What does that mean?”

“I do not know, I have lost track of this conversation. Just take off your clothes.”

I smile and try to contain my laughter.

“I have told you before that sex with you is better when you are not speaking.” Lagertha says coming in.

She smiles at me.

Ragnar sighs and moves away.

I watch as he starts to remove his clothes hastily.

“Come on.” He tells me. “Take it off.”

Lagertha comes up behind me and starts to slowly unlace my shirt.

Her hands brush tantalizingly against my skin.

I close my eyes with a sigh.

Rough hands tug at my breeches.

I open my eyes.

Ragnar’s electric blue eyes stare at me intensely.

Lagertha kisses my neck, her teeth nipping the lobe of my ear.

I groan.

My clothes falls to the floor and soon I am lying on the bed, wandering hands all over me.

I no longer knew which hands belonged to Lagertha and which belonged to Ragnar.

They bring me past the peak of pleasure again and again until I feel like I am dying.

I try to catch my breath.

“I think we have killed our priest.” Ragnar says.

Lagertha laughs.

I crack my eyes open.

Ragnar bends her over me as he takes her from behind.

She kisses me and I tangle my hands in her hair as I savor her kiss before I move my hands down her shoulders to her arms before cupping her breasts in my hands.

She gasps as I rub her nipples.

“I think we have brought him back.”

“He realized Valhalla could never offer what we do.” She says breathlessly.

Ragnar stares at me over her shoulder.

I stare back.

“After I have given her pleasure, I will sheath myself in your warmth.” He promises.

I moan, my body shuddering.

*********************

Rollo looks at me.

“Remember to stand properly.”

I lift my shield and practice swinging and thrusting.

“Lift your feet or you will trip yourself. Come on priest!”

I pant as the sun beams down on me mercilessly.

Sweat drips down my back.

I take a moment to breathe before continuing.

“Better.”

I continue to practice until he calls a halt.

I let myself fall back on the sand.

I close my eyes and let my breathing slow down to normal.

Every time I held my axe and my shield, memories of the battle come back to distract me.

I had the blood of men on my hands and no amount of prayer would ever absolve me of the murders I had committed.

“What are you thinking about?”

“Battle.”

He sits next to me.

His hand nudges my arm.

“You have nothing to be fearful of. I will always be by your side.”

I look at Rollo.

“Thank you Brother Rollo.”

“You are welcome Brother Athelstan.”

I smile.

“What a pretty scene this is.”

I look up as Ragnar blocks out the sun.

“Brother.” Rollo says.

Ragnar nods, acknowledging him.

“Athelstan.” He says looking at me.

I sit up.

“Yes?”

“Ubbe needs you. He will not settle with Lagertha, I believe he has become addicted to the sound of your voice.”

I stand.

“I will wash up and go to him.”

“Good.” He pulls me close so that he can speak in my ear. “And perhaps after you have finished with Ubbe, you will show me just well your grip has become.”

I nod, a blush creeping up my neck.

Rollo’s laughter follows me all the way to the house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I was watching the new episode while I tried to finish this last chapter and I was yelling at Athelstan to run to Ragnar. I mean, I knew he couldn’t but still. I don’t know how much longer I can wait for the reunion. So sweet how Ragnar put on the bracelet he gave Athelstan and then kept caressing it.
> 
> Also, King Horik should die.


End file.
